Expecting

one of these days,one of these moments,i will go into labor.it will take some hours.there will be contractions.the midwife will be called over.it will be morning, noon or night. or all three.and in the end, out will come a baby. this tiny beingthat has grown inside me for nine months, for all my life, since i myself was a fetus,she has been there. here.an egg-in-waiting. i am expecting, and expectingis not what you are supposed to do in buddhism, in life.you are supposed to let goand yet i am about to embark on the biggest journey ofattachment ever. motherhood. i suppose it will come naturally, as pregnancy has.my belly has grown, baby has developed, hormones have been secreted, bodily functions revised --all to accommodate the miracle of birth. i am expecting but i am still enjoying each peaceful, easy day as it comes...i do accept that they will not be as peaceful or easy with a newborn in the casita.but i will still open to peace, presence and patience in each mindful moment. i am expectingLife to continue to flowthrough my veinsthrobbing down the river bankscold water, blue blood i am expectinga baby humani have no framework with which to comprehend this, other thanknowing what it is like to get a  new puppy or kittenwhich is always fun and exciting.a baby is more work though.100% dependentand has a longer life expectancy i am expectingbut all the whiledroppingexpectationssince, after all,i know not what to expecthow to actwhat to dohow i will feeluntil the moment of birth.